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As we progress, or move forward in time, my condition has progressed as well. Radiology, in the form of two CT scans, explains the progression of my cancer. Comparing markers from previous scans, the words that jumped out of these reports were not the medical jargon. They were the adjectives that described my illness, organ by organ. Repetitive words like enlarged, progressed, increased, and innumerable. Unfortunately, missing were the words I had hoped to see. Words like reduced, maintained, or even stable. Sadly, all that was gained during chemotherapy has been lost. The current treatment is not proving to be effective.

As my condition has changed, so too will its treatment. My schedule now shifts to 3 weeks on, 1 week off. Infused will be a recently approved chemotherapy, originally introduced for the treatment of breast cancer. Having shown promise in this area, clinical trials began focusing on a few other cancers. The type of cancer I’ve been diagnosed with was included in these trials, and one of those which showed favorable results. The drug was designed with a type of homing device to concentrate on the cancer cells with less toxicity than other chemotherapy medications. Our plan is to run this program for 2 cycles (2 months) before scanning to check for new markers. We will set the stage for a new battle using a new weapon. As with all therapeutic drugs, the list of potential side-effects is long. Hopefully, the realized effects will be minimal. Regardless, I am ready for this fight!

The possibilities seen through the lens of medical advancement continues to give me hope. The potential to become stronger in my faith and deeper in my love gives me a sense of joy. So, I will close with one of my favorite quotes on the importance of possibilities.

"If I were to wish for anything, I should not wish for wealth and power, but for the passionate sense of the potential, for the eye which, ever young and ardent, sees the possible. Pleasure disappoints, possibility never. And what wine is so sparkling, what so fragrant, what so intoxicating, as possibility!" --Kierkegaard

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